Yesterday I was asked to do a reading at a dear friend’s wedding in August. There are not many bigger compliments one can be paid. I am truly touched and excited beyond belief.
During the longest night ever, when I was so very, very scared and so very, very alone there was one friend I called. Just to feel less alone. I have two dear friends that I went to high school with. They were bridesmaids at my child bride first wedding. They were there when I gave birth to Daughter Number One. They knew her for her whole life and they came to her funeral. During the longest night ever one of my dear friends had a young child that wasn’t sleeping well. The other lived alone and so I rang her. And she answered. And she kept answering my calls, all through that long, long night. Even as I went from confused to terrified to distraught. By the next morning, when I knew the worst, she still answered my calls. Then she came to my Daughter’s funeral and in all the years since she has stayed my friend. Even when being my friend cannot have been easy and judging me most definitely would have been. That’s true of all my friends, the ones who love me and I know how lucky I am.
After my Daughter Number One died I watched as my dear friend met someone new who made her smile. I was privileged to watch her fall in love. I’ve watched as she’s renovated a home and raised two daughters and built a life with her one true love. This is one of the strongest, most enduring relationships I’ve seen in my life. I’m sure they have their hard times, everyone does, relationships are hard work but love has prevailed and in August, when they will celebrate ten years together my dear friend and her true love will be married.
Kind of. Sort of. Except it can’t technically be called a wedding because my dear friend’s one true love is also a woman. And my country doesn’t recognise their ‘kind’ of love and commitment – that would be the REAL kind if you ask me! My country says that the only ‘true’ marriages are between a man and a woman. On this issue I am embarrassed by the laws of this land. We are behind much of the civilised world and it feels backwards in the extreme.
Love is love.
I told you recently about a friend confiding in me about proposing to her partner. I wrote of the happiness I felt. That also is an EPIC love story and luckily for you their love story right up to the grand proposal has been shared with the world on my friends blog. So, do yourselves a favour and go check it out for a feel good read and try not to cry at the video (I failed)! If you do, you’ll note that my friend is also a girl in love with a girl.
Love is love! In this world where so many bad things happen to so many good people, in this life that is so short and when love is all that remains when everything else has gone why can’t love just be love? I get to plan my wedding and call it that. I get to have my marriage recognised by law. How can anyone judge that my love is more real, or true, or deserving than either of my friends? They are building lives together, they are raising children together, they have made homes together. How could my love be more valid just because my partner is a certain sex? There’s a simple answer. It’s not.
Love is love.