It is another glorious day here in the beautiful location in which I live. I am sitting here in a t-shirt and shorts and it is hard to believe this is Winter. Things are business as usual. I am still freaked out by my inability to split myself in two and be in two places at the same time, i.e. in hospital with Son Number One and at home with Daughter and Son Number Two. Consequently I am feeling a little shakey and a lot sad.
If there is a bright spot on my horizon it is that there are less than 30 sleeps until the Current Person of Interest flies in. Unfortunately, there are only just less than 30 sleeps and that means there is still a looooonnng time to wait until I see him so instead of the bright spot on the horizon it is more like just the horizon. But I guess that is a start and as I get closer I’m sure I’ll be able to see the bright spot and focus on that.
My romantic life is another instance where having a clone would be an advantage. There could be one of me here, looking after my children, and one of me with the Current Person of Interest. Or if not with him then at least readily available to be with him on a whim. To stay up all night with no responsibilities in the morning. To go out to dinner, and a movie, and a late dessert and not worry about childcare because the other me would have that covered.
I think the hardest thing is to know I am doing the best that I can, that I really cannot try any harder and still feel like it is not good enough. I hate feeling like I am letting people down, including myself.