Connected.

Daughter Number Two can sing really well. For an almost six year old she can really belt it out. She watches a lot of Barbie DVD’s with Baby Daddy. This is a man who was totally opposed to Barbie before Daughter Number Two was born. Anyway, I digress. Many of the songs she sings are from Barbie movies. She has been singing one today with the following lyrics;

I’m blind-folded on this carriage ride that they call life.
Keep trying to make it through the next turn, knuckles white and holdin’ tight.
So here I go, takin’ the curve,
but I know that I’m never alone.
I think of you, and how you never let me go.

I feel connected (connected), protected (protected), it’s like you’re standing right with me all the time.
You hear me (you hear me), you’re near me (you’re near me),
and everything else is gonna be alright.
‘Cause nothing can break this, nothing can break this, nothing can break this tie.
Connected… oooooh connected inside.

It’s not an accident, the time we spent apart.
But now we’re so close, I can always find you right here in my heart.
You’ve given me somethin’ I need, and I don’t ever want it to end.
Because of you, I know I’ve found my strength again.

I feel connected (connected), protected (protected), it’s like you’re standing right with me all the time.
You hear me (you hear me), you’re near me (you’re near me),
and everything else is gonna be alright.
‘Cause nothing can break this, nothing can break this, nothing can break this
Connected… ooooh connected inside.

Everytime that I breathe, I can feel the energy.
Reachin’ out, flowin’ through, you to me and me to you. wake or dream,
walk or stand, you are everywhere I am.
Seperate souls, unified, touching at the speed of light.

oh, yeaaaaaaaaah, oh whoa YEAH

I feel connected (connected), protected (protected), it’s like you’re standing right with me all the time.
You hear me, you’re near me,
and everything else’s gonna be alright.
connected (connected), protected (protected), it’s like you’re sitting right with me all the time.
You hear me, you’re near me,
and everything else’s gonna be alright.

‘Cause nothing can break this, nothing can break this, nothing can break this tie.

connected, connected inside, connected, connected inside, connected.

oh Yeah!

In a funny way it is comforting to me, hearing her singing those lyrics about staying connected although apart. I leave here knowing our connection has not been dimmed by distance or time. With three sleeps to go we have been talking about my going back. We have been talking about her coming to visit me. It is one of the things on my list to sort out on my return.

My choices may not make sense to anyone else but I don’t need anyone else’s approval. People say to me all of the time that they don’t know how I have made it through the last almost ten years. Truth be told, neither do I. All I know is that it has been hard work.

I got Son Number One to adulthood. He is set up with everything he needs and all that I could hope for. He told me last night that he is making friends at the day program he is attending. Son Number Two has had opportunities and experiences. He is no longer the four year old who had his world blown apart.

I’ve done the best that I could do with what I had. I am not perfect but I have done my best. It is all any of us can do, at the end of the day.

Two roads diverged in a wood, and I –
I took the one less travelled by,
And that has made all the difference.

Robert Frost

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