As I write this the Current Person of Interest is making his way to the Airport. I am expecting a text message from him shortly to confirm he has checked in. I literally cannot breathe with excitement. I have been catching myself holding my breath for two days now, and have to keep reminding myself to start breathing again. It is almost as if I have been holding myself together so tightly for this day that to even let air escape me may be my undoing.
I am only speaking for myself. I know that others endure far greater, more painful separations. I have as well. Still I have found the last two months really difficult. Each time I leave someone it is with the knowledge that I may never see them again. In fact, until I do see them again I can’t help but think that I won’t. As excited as I am today it is also quite surreal. Too much for my weary oxygen starved brain to comprehend.
Because when the Current Person of Interest gets here it will be so good. We communicate very well, and use every medium at our disposal to do so when apart, regularly and often. But we also communicate very well in other ways that aren’t at our disposal when we are so far apart and it will be so so good to be able to speak to him without words. It will be a feast of the senses, those I can’t engage while we are apart like smell and taste and oh god! touch but also heightened experiences of sight and sound. To see him in front of me, and look into his eyes with nothing but emotion between us. To hear his voice, subtly different in person. And did I mention SMELL and TASTE and TOUCH?!!!!!
He’s checked in, and he’s waiting to board. I’ve got to go. There’s some place I need to be.